Thank you for all the love and support. I think we are finding our way through this. Last night’s viewing was an opportunity for our dear gym/lake gang to say farewell to Jordan before they head out to hike the West Coast trail. I want all of you to go and enjoy your families and the long weekend – we have things well under control. The only thing I may need help with is rearranging the flowers and getting them over to the church sometime Tuesday morning.I will let you know.

The funeral arrangements are coming together. Turns out that the brother of one of Jordan’s stalwart friends is the music pastor at Holy Family – so we meet with him today to finalize the music. Greg keeps telling me he can deliver the eulogy – I think not. So still under negotiation. We have decided to blow whatever money we might have spent at Jordan’s wedding on a wake – honouring our son’s Scottish and Irish heritage. Immediately after the formal church service we will head into the hall, grab a beer and have a few laughs and tell more of his story. 

 I am so grateful that we decided to hold the viewing. Greg spent over an hour in the viewing room with Jordan and his cousins Jake and Caylen and Dylan and his Aunt Sharon just talking – Sharon said it was an amazing spiritual experience – and Greg seemed more settled. Me –  I waited till everyone was gone, closed the door and then sobbed my heart out on Jordan’s chest. The first time I have truly let go since the hospital. Some of the weight and pressure I was carrying was lifted.

Tonight the Chartier’s gather at Dave’s so we can mourn together before Marc and Yvette head to Europe on Saturday. Which in the longstanding Chartier tradition means bottles and bottles of red wine and retelling all of the favourite family escapades. Michelle and John will be home as well and I don’t think Greg will truly begin to heal until he can feel his  sister’s arms around him. Lucas seems to gain strength and comfort from being around the family – he is interacting in a way I have never seen before; my little introverted soul.

 Sunday my beautiful niece arrives from San Francisco. Sunday is also the night we say our final farewell to Jordan and send him on his way.

This morning the  funeral seems too far away. Sometimes that makes me anxious, the next moment I am grateful for the additional time to get my emotional shit together so I can give Jordan the kind of service he deserves.

 Please let a little sunshine and happiness into your lives this weekend. You are the reason I can find the strength.